Originally posted on May 6, 2020 @ 4:02 am

My personal experience in counseling, teaching and volunteering to humanitarian causes has introduced me to a wide variety of people of all walks of life. One thing that almost all of them had in common was problems: some had family issues, others financial issues, others romantic issues, and so on. Also, some of them had legitimate problems while others had self-inflicted trivialities grown to gigantic proportions. The most ironic thing that I noticed though was that those who had truly insurmountable problems almost always resisted being pitied or given help, but those whose problems were trivial or self-inflicted begged for other people’s help.

While this does mean that pity is pretty much useless in both occasions since it doesn’t add to or remove anything from the issues at hand, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t help. However, it’s a great indicator to how you can help that person. Usually, people who are actively begging for pity are looking for quick fixes. They want you to give them money so that they spend it on doing the same things that got them into trouble the first place. They would blame all their problems on the people around them. For example, they would say that they were abusing drugs or alcohol because their parents got divorced when they were little. In such a case, you should never help them find the quick fix because they will abuse your kindheartedness; instead, you should send them to a professional who will know how to deal with them firmly. On the other hand, when you can obviously see that someone needs help but is not actively asking for it, this is when you should absolutely lend a helping hand. However, you shouldn’t do it directly because it will almost always be refused; do it secretly and indirectly so that the receiver can appreciate it and has no way of letting his pride return it. But, do keep in mind that such people are resourceful and will try very hard to find a way to pass the help on to someone who needs it more.

I know that all religions do encourage helping the poor and the needy by giving them; however, experience and logic shows that giving them money is not the answer most of the time, and it is only a quick fix. Just like all quick fixes, money’s help lasts as long as it is there. When the money’s gone, the beggar is back on the street and is encouraged to beg even more. Therefore, if you cannot help a person get out of his current predicament but you still want to help, the best way for you to do it is to offer him food. This will prevent them from using your money to indulge in their negative habits such as drugs or alcohol. It will also give them the necessary energy to actually try doing something other than begging. Also, giving money should mostly be avoided with kids: they have a whole life ahead of them, and they shouldn’t be encouraged to waste it begging.

In the end, I would like to share how Amma (the Hugging Saint) truly helped people affected by the tsunami in 2004. After crisis relief efforts were executed and everyone was more or less safe and sheltered, Amma started tailoring classes for the village women and gave many of them sewing machines so that they could use them to make a living and cloth themselves. You can read more about this here. What we can mainly learn from Amma’s example here is that we shouldn’t just help the easy way, we should help the smart way.

Originally posted on April 16, 2020 @ 6:02 am

Many of us always repeat the saying “everything happens for a reason.” This would also apply to people; many of them suddenly show up in your life for a reason. Unfortunately, because of all the mischief that we hear about everyday about people scamming or exploiting others, our sense of trust has become severely corrupted that we feel such encounters as “too good to be true” or that there is a hidden motive behind them.

However, such meetings are truly governed by synchronicity, which states that the world brings you what you need when you need it most. You can read more about it here and find out how you can detect and make use of synchronicities. I’m not saying that you should jump into any synchronicity that happens; I’m just saying that you should open up with LOVE to that person and give them the benefit of the doubt: innocent until proven guilty. Devise a few ways to truly test their loyalty and trust. A good way to do that would be to see how quickly they trust you with some of their sensitive information. If they completely refuse it, then there is no reason for you to trust them too much. If they accept it with a touch of care, it would be ideal because they would also be testing your loyalty and trust at the same time.

In all cases, before you jump into such partnerships, think about how much trusting that person would harm you and in what ways. Afterwards, create means for you to protect yourself in such eventualities without totally blocking out that person’s attempts at friendship or partnership. As in all things, hope for the best but plan for the worst. In conclusion, be open with LOVE to all people. While some of them may hurt you, there are still good people in the world who want your trust and who sincerely want to grow alongside you. Even those who hurt you will also bring you valuable lessons and life experiences.

Originally posted on April 9, 2020 @ 8:59 pm

These anti-bullying campaigns are getting way out of hand. Once the serious school work starts, many children stop loving going to school; however, this is more due to lack of parent support than of anything else.

No matter what the school says about them working with the students and trying to finish everything in school, there is always a part that needs to be played by the parents, regardless how minimal it may be. Once a child feels more or less alone doing his school work without parent supervision and/or assistance, it is a normal human tendency to slack off, especially with all the distractions which are available; however, instead of limiting a child’s access to these games and shows during the school week and putting up with a bit (or sometimes a lot) of nagging, many parents just prefer to keep the child distracted. The result is that the child starts to get behind on school work and ultimately begin to fail. While the child doesn’t want to lose access to his favorite games and the parents don’t want to hear any nagging, a scapegoat is needed: “my child is being bullied, and the school isn’t doing anything about it.”

Just like the parents, the child also wants to blame his failure on something other than himself and to cast the blame as far away from his videogames as possible, so he plays along. By dramatizing events like an accidental bump in the playground or acting traumatized because his classmate called him stupid, enough repetitions of the same cycle eventually makes it a reality. In addition to that, children are excellent storytellers: they can create the most vivid stories about how they are being taunted and hurt in school by their peers. Parents who truly believe that their children don’t lie to them are the most gullible; either that or they are too involved in finding a scapegoat for their child’s failure that they are ready to believe anything. Seriously, how many times have we heard our parents say that we are the most perfect angels while we had a huge list of mischief up our sleeves? But yes, give a child a chance to escape punishment and he will take it no matter what you believe.

Human psychology is the most self-destructive weapon anyone can wield. Whatever you believe is happening to you, your mind will find various ways to validate it and make it true. If you are honest enough with yourself, you can’t but admit that this is true. Children are even more prone to that because their world revolves around small events with seemingly big significance to them, so if they believe that they are being bullied, they will find as much evidence of it as they can, and then they will fill in the gaps with whatever they can come up with. Parents, instead of helping their kids get out of that situation by teaching them how to gather proper evidence (if any), play along with them because it’s easier to believe that their child is failing because of bullying and not because of lack of parental intervention. And finally, as a compensation for having a tough time at school, parents end up allowing children more time on video games which are the root cause of the issue. I am not saying that we have to ban video games completely; I am just saying that too much of one thing is unhealthy. Too little of it is also unhealthy, as children still need to be exposed to TV and games so that they can stay on the same footing with their peers.

Instead of allowing their children to wallow in their own self-created misery, parents should empower their kids by tackling the real problem: lack of focus. They have to admit that all this cycle is because they have yet to take responsibility for their children’s mental health by creating specific rules and routines. Sure there will be some (or plenty of) tantrums, but they will decrease over time as the child falls into these routines and starts to manage his own time.

In the end, I am not saying that bullying does not exist; I am just saying that its effects on a child’s mental health and wellbeing can be mitigated through proper parental intervention. Moreover, bullying doesn’t only happen in schools; it happens everywhere, and children need to learn how to deal with it and not how to suffer from it and become “offended” easily. For more information on that, check out my article “Offended, … Deal with it!“

Originally posted on April 14, 2020 @ 5:07 am

Other than the general investigation conducted by the DIBP about your background and your history, the most important thing they look at and ask you about is your Statement of Purpose (SoP). In this article, we will be discussing how to write and what you need to include in your SoP to make it the best it can be. 

1- Be honest and realistic

If you really are coming to study in Australia, then you must have a good reason for it, so make sure to detail these reasons. However, keep the “more is less” rule in mind: do not be over-eager with information. Share enough information to prove that you are a GTE but don’t add anything too much. Additionally, make sure that the information you discuss is realistic and not over the top. Your education agent should be able to advise you on the matter. 

2- Talk about yourself and your situation in your country

In this section, you need to show the DIBP officers that you have strong ties with your country and that what you are doing (going to study in Australia) will ultimately serve you in your home country. It’s good to share specific events in the future that would require you to come back such as a job you hold, a business you are working on, or a family member’s wedding. Also discuss your economic situation and show the DIBP officer that you are well off in your country and are living a good life. If not, then your visa may be refused because you really have nothing to come back to in your country. 

3- Explain your educational choice

There are three things you need to show in this section. The first thing is your reason for choosing this education provider and not another. Show the DIBP that you’ve done your research about the education provider and why you think you would fit in. And while you are doing research, we move on to the second item to include, which is your reason for choosing this specific course or major. Discuss your reasons for choosing this industry and don’t be afraid to share facts and figures that show that you’ve done your research. Also, if you can connect this research to show even more how it will help you in your own country, it would be even better. The third thing to do in this section is to compare between the education in your country and in Australia concerning the same major to explain to immigration why it is better for you to study this course in Australia and not in your home country. 

4- Explain your travel and immigration history

This section is especially important for onshore students because they will need to show the DIBP that they are not just doing the course so that they could stay longer in Australia. As for offshore students, talk about where you have previously travelled and what were your main reasons for it, especially if you have studied abroad before. 

5- Support, support, support

The most important thing to remember in your SoP is that talk is cheap and lies get you nowhere. Whatever you write in the SoP, you must be able to prove it. You can add reference letters from your employers, recommendations from your teachers, evidence that you have enough money to live and study in Australia, evidence of ownership of things in your home country (such as cars, land, houses, businesses, etc…), and anything else that might serve to support your claim. Your education consultant should be able to advise you on the best things to include in your SoP. 

6- Write it yourself

Immigration wants to know you, not your education agent. It is common malpractice for education agents to write the SoP on behalf of the applicant, but this is bad for many reasons. First, no one knows you or your reasons better than yourself. Second, it is very easy for immigration to know that someone else wrote yur SoP for you especially if their English or way of communicating is different from yours. And third, when education agents write SoP letters for many students, immigration will know their style and will know that they are doing this, so they will be more picky with their students’ visas and will refuse them more often. 

In conclusion, the SoP may be the most important document that you will be handing immigration for your visa application, so treat it with care and don’t take it lightly. If you need any help, we at Edustralia are always ready to assist you, just contact us!

Originally posted on April 6, 2020 @ 8:04 pm

Most of us find it very difficult to evolve and improve ourselves, and this is mainly because we need someone to look at us with fresh, yet sharp, eyes. When we look around, we find a huge number of so-called life coaches and mentors in different disciplines such as NLP, auto-hypnosis, and an abundance of other programs. Unfortunately, while some of these mentors or gurus may be authentic, the vast majority are in it for the money. In this article, we will discuss the various criteria that a mentor should possess before apprenticing yourself to him/her. Finding a true mentor is rare, but once the seeker of wisdom is ready, the universe will place the right mentor (or sometimes mentors) on his path.

NOTE: This article deals more with choosing a more holistic mentor, and this is not to be confused with choosing a professional consultant.

#1: A mentor does not charge fees for his counsel but accepts gifts

As a general rule of thumb, when a guru or a mentor puts a price tag on his coaching, then it’s mainly a scam. True wisdom is freely given because the mentor knows that by sharing his wisdom, he will only be gaining more of it. I have seen mentors and gurus charging hundreds and even thousands of dollars for single sessions with them. In spirituality, this goes completely against every principle. On the other hand, it is the duty of the disciple to show gratitude to his mentor who will gracefully accept any kinds of gifts, be it financial or otherwise, as long as it is given with LOVE (see this article for more details). However, true mentors know that not all disciples can afford gifts, yet this is no reason to refuse their discipleship. While the universe will find appropriate ways to reward the mentor for his work, the mentor doesn’t really care about this. Enjoying the evolution of the disciple is tremendously rewarding for the mentor beyond any gift.

#2: A mentor builds trust with his disciples before anything else

A mentor knows that the road to wisdom and personal evolution is not easy, and many disciples can’t handle all the hardships which need to be endured on the way. Accordingly, the mentor knows that he may have to sometimes force his disciple to do things which are outside his nature, and maybe even difficult, in order to overcome certain fears, faults or shortcomings. If trust is not there, the student can easily give up and leave to go find another mentor. However, if there is enough trust and love between the mentor and the disciple, the latter will know that the former wouldn’t ask him to do something haphazard and that there is a very important lesson to be learned from the assigned task. This is why most mentors would require a promise of almost absolute obedience from their disciples as a test of faith.

#3: A mentor can discuss almost anything

While a mentor may have certain areas of expertise, he should have enough general knowledge about almost anything. When he doesn’t, he can admit it while making sure to research it later, for it may be an important anchor into the disciple’s spirit. Moreover, a mentor who has learned just one method and uses it with every disciple is not truly a mentor, but more of a teacher. Such a coach will not be able to work or succeed with all his students, but only with the limited number on whom the methodology can be applied. Such a person may be better employed as a professional consultant for he is only able to tackle his areas of expertise and not much more. On the other hand, a true mentor takes in the disciple globally, assesses his personality, strengths, weaknesses, fears, and faults and then devises an adaptable personalized plan for each disciple accordingly.

#4: A mentor sees a lesson in every experience

There is no need to create hypothetical situations or virtual scenarios to teach disciples needed lessons. The true mentor knows that life itself will provide the necessary opportunities to send a message to the disciple in the most efficient manner. Therefore, a mentor only prepares a general plan of work with his disciples and modifies it based on what is currently happening in the disciple’s life. Sometimes the mentor may use problems from his own life in order to send a message across. The mentor does not see the disciple as a client, but as an extension of himself through which the will of the universe is being executed. While a paid coach will not teach everything so that the student keeps coming back for more, a true mentor gives everything he has and more, wanting his disciple to become better than he is. In doing so, the mentor and the disciple evolve together and become even better conduits of the will of the universe.

#5: A mentor may refuse disciples indirectly

While a life coach or any type of consultant or trainer takes in almost all students since they are paying clients, a mentor only takes those whom he deems ready. When a disciple is not ready, the mentor will not tell him to go away per se; instead, he would set him on a seemingly impossible yet useful task. If the disciple accomplishes it, he becomes ready to be adopted by the mentor. On the other hand, if the disciple fails or abandons the given task, he will remove himself from the mentor’s tutelage and then either abandon the idea of finding a mentor altogether or goes looking for another mentor.

#6: A mentor finds and creates opportunities for his disciples

When a mentor accepts his disciple, he will employ all his network for the success, benefit and betterment of his disciple. While a coach simply points the direction, the mentor takes his disciple by the hand and provides him with the best opportunities at his disposal in order to make him better than he ever was.

#7: A mentor can be anyone

While coaches work on becoming famous and successful, a mentor is content with himself. He may or may not be famous, but in either case, it makes no difference when he chooses his disciples. Many mentors work from behind the scenes and are not authorities in any fields in particular; however, they all have one thing in common: practical wisdom. They may have the knowledge of various methods that can be used in different fields, but they rely more on intuition and a true connection with their disciples in order to help them perfect themselves as much as possible. Despite all their wisdom, mentors do not need to have perfect lives in the eyes of the world, yet their lives are perfect in their own eyes, for they provide ample opportunities to evolve, learn and teach. A mentor may be homeless, have trouble with his family, or be facing any other problems, yet that does not decrease his wisdom nor his power at all. In fact, it is through their utter humanity that true mentors can actually impart wisdom upon their disciples. While a coach shares his knowledge from his high horse, a real mentor does it through a genuine sharing of experience with his disciples.

Finally, anyone, from the most illiterate farmer to the most highly educated doctor, can be a true mentor provided he has practical wisdom shared through humility, can exercise empathy by being intimately connected with his disciples, and offers his counsel freely with LOVE while receiving their gratitude with similar LOVE.

Originally posted on March 30, 2020 @ 4:38 pm

And yet, when you got to know them truly

They turned out more beautiful than you imagined

As if their features changed with the wind?

And have you ever known someone good looking

Yet, when you knew what they were brewing

Their faces deformed and melted away

As if they were eaten by decay?

It is true that what is within

Every good deed and every sin

Is reflected through the face

Just like an advertising space

Have you ever wondered why

Beauty differs to every eye?

Did it ever occur to you

That this is what you’re attracted to?

What you see as beautiful is what is made for you

By destiny or biology, it’s just true

You are attracted to people by their features

Before you join their life’s adventures

For the first frontier in starting a link

Does not lie in what the mind’s to think

The beginning chance is in what the eye sees

Before you delve into their life’s seas

It is in this that life gives you signs

And through this, reveals its designs

Just follow your eyes and your heart

But also, make sure you’re smart

Be careful when someone you once saw fair

Starts to change like the clothes you wear

For that’s a sign that their hearts are changing

And that their destinies are rearranging

Originally posted on April 8, 2020 @ 8:52 pm

“A true leader should have the power to begin, the eloquence to communicate, the patience to execute and the wisdom to evaluate. Without one, he remains a slave to he who possesses it.”

In order for a person to be a leader, he must have good command of the 4 elements in his personality. These are the following:

• fire: he needs to have a vision which is innovative along with the courage to start a project.
• Wind: he should be able to communicate and get his idea across to those around him so that they join him in his efforts.
• Water: He should have patience and dedication to get things done. Nothing (except catastrophes) happens overnight, and true success needs time to be built.
• Earth: It is no use to keep doing something if it’s not leading to results. A leader should have the wisdom to question his own judgments and paths before he discovers that they will lead nowhere.

A truly efficient leader should have all four of these skills in order to qualify as a leader; otherwise, if he is missing any one of these skills, he will have to outsource it. This means that he would need to recruit someone who has the missing skill(s) in order to have a successful project.

Would you like to learn more about how to develop a holistic personality? check out Developing the Spirit Personality.

Originally posted on April 1, 2020 @ 5:10 pm

It is a universal principle that when two people meet with boredom, they end up talking about a third. Also, it’s usually not in a good way. Think about yourself. How many times have you ended up being more offended by a person’s behavior after having listened to another person discussing her? This is despite the fact that that same behavior hadn’t been bothering you much before.

Usually, we tend to not pay attention to small things when we are busy, but we start seeing them more and more when someone else mentions them to us. People are always eager to belong and take sides even though we may not always have all the facts straight. Psychologically, we tend to take the side of the first person to bring the problem to our attention.

But there’s a big problem with that.

Imagine that you are at a new workplace with two others: John and Alex, and you are friends with both of them. During break, John comes to you complaining about how Alex bosses people around. Previously, you hadn’t noticed that Alex does that, but after John told you, you started seeing it more and more. As time passes and John complains more and more, you become more and more annoyed by it. You also become more friendly with John and somewhat bitter with Alex. Your workplace become a hell because of Alex, and you become negative with him. He senses your negativity and becomes more bitter towards you. Eventually, you either resign or keep bothering Alex till he does.

The bigger problem would be that even if Alex were to do something good, you would still interpret it negatively almost no matter what. And this is sad.

But where did the problem start?

It started with gossip, and not only through spreading gossip but by listening to it. This is why, in your life you should take an important stance against gossip: refuse to spread it, and refuse to listen to it. Not only will this help you keep your mind clear, but it will also save you from making unnecessary enemies. However, make it a point to look for the good in people and talk about it.

Originally posted on April 3, 2020 @ 6:48 pm

Throughout the ages, people from all cultures and spiritual backgrounds have debated one thing above all others: what is the path to true happiness? While some found it through meditation, others found it through self-sacrifice; however, the debate rages on about which path is the one true path. Having experimented with various forms of spirituality and going as far as touching the infinite and building a connection with the universe, I found the answer: if whatever you are doing makes you happy and fills you with a thrill and a desire to live and share that life with those around you, than that is the path to happiness.

There can never be one and only one path to eternal happiness for everyone, for that would be a recipe for hell and chaos. And this is the biggest reason for wars and especially religious ones. Let’s assume that meditation is the only way to happiness, so everyone on earth let go of everything else and started meditating: humanity would perish within a month because there will be no one to make food, no one to clean gutters, no one to maintain infrastructure, and no one to take care of babies. The same thing applies to prayer and any other form of spiritual and ritualistic practice.

The same would also apply to non-ritualistic practice as well. If each one of us was to dedicate his life for the service of others, then there would be no one pursuing his own goals for others to lend a hand. And if there is no one taking an initiative, everyone would be just waiting for someone to help and serve, which would also just take the meaning out of it.

Based on the above, there is no one true and definite path to happiness. Instead, each person has his own path to it, and it’s usually not just one path, but a combination of many. But how do we define our path to happiness? It’s easy; you just have to answer three simple questions:

1- Am I happy doing this?

One of the main indicators of you finding your path is that doing it makes you happy, whether you succeed or fail. Happiness is in the challenge and the journey towards a goal whether you will reach it or not.

2- Does it benefit me and those around me without harming anyone?

In our world today, there are many forms of psychological illnesses that bring joy to one person by harming another, such as pedophilia and rape. However, after the deed is done, the perpetrator is usually filled with guilt and remorse. If what you enjoy harms another, then there can be no true happiness coming from it.

3- Do I want to share it with others?

Being the social creatures we are, part of our happiness is in finding others to share it with. If what brings you happiness is something you would want to share with others so that they can enjoy it as well, then that’s the road for you. However, always be careful not to make it your sole speciality to the extent that others avoid you because that is all you talk about.

If you are able to answer a resounding YES to all three questions, then that is your path to happiness, and that is what you should be focusing on in your life. However, that is not all: your path to happiness does not have to be just one. People change and evolve throughout their lifetimes, and its normal for interests to change and for new interests to emerge through life. Therefore, it is very normal for your path to happiness to change as you grow and as you discover more things in life.

Originally posted on March 27, 2020 @ 4:01 pm